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| Name | G | AB | R | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | TB | BB | K | SB | CS | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WAR |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Bass Reeves 2B | 108 | 457 | 119 | 139 | 55 | 5 | 15 | 67 | 249 | 76 | 113 | 90 | 17 | .304 | .401 | .545 | .946 | 7.5 |
| Ted Giannoulas 1B | 108 | 450 | 92 | 133 | 32 | 2 | 30 | 101 | 259 | 67 | 120 | 0 | 0 | .296 | .382 | .576 | .958 | 3.4 |
| Lawn Gnomes RF | 108 | 445 | 79 | 147 | 45 | 1 | 20 | 94 | 254 | 49 | 101 | 0 | 0 | .330 | .393 | .571 | .963 | 4.3 |
| Daniel Plainview C | 108 | 438 | 83 | 156 | 51 | 4 | 22 | 105 | 281 | 58 | 113 | 1 | 1 | .356 | .429 | .642 | 1.071 | 6.7 |
| Chazz Lamborghini DH | 108 | 437 | 79 | 113 | 22 | 0 | 25 | 87 | 210 | 47 | 109 | 0 | 0 | .259 | .329 | .481 | .809 | 0.8 |
| Xicoyotl Montalbán 3B | 108 | 430 | 75 | 124 | 30 | 2 | 23 | 82 | 227 | 29 | 88 | 3 | 2 | .288 | .332 | .528 | .860 | 2.7 |
| Literal Flamingo SS | 108 | 403 | 73 | 121 | 39 | 8 | 7 | 59 | 197 | 32 | 94 | 0 | 3 | .300 | .349 | .489 | .837 | 2.5 |
| Smalls LF | 108 | 403 | 87 | 120 | 29 | 2 | 24 | 69 | 225 | 67 | 103 | 0 | 0 | .298 | .400 | .558 | .958 | 3.2 |
| Yvonne Escence CF | 108 | 398 | 55 | 97 | 26 | 1 | 7 | 53 | 146 | 44 | 93 | 0 | 1 | .244 | .329 | .367 | .696 | 0.9 |
