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| Name | G | AB | R | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | TB | BB | K | SB | CS | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WAR |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Faye Tafo-Felia CF | 14 | 63 | 8 | 17 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 11 | 32 | 4 | 16 | 0 | 0 | .270 | .313 | .508 | .821 | 0.6 |
| Michael Honcho RF | 14 | 62 | 10 | 16 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 4 | 24 | 6 | 8 | 10 | 2 | .258 | .324 | .387 | .711 | 0.3 |
| Dusty Backstop C | 14 | 59 | 8 | 20 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 12 | 32 | 3 | 10 | 0 | 0 | .339 | .365 | .542 | .907 | 0.8 |
| Brian Taylor 1B | 14 | 59 | 9 | 19 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 25 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 0 | .322 | .403 | .424 | .827 | 0.3 |
| Willy Whacker DH | 14 | 55 | 9 | 22 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 8 | 35 | 8 | 13 | 0 | 0 | .400 | .476 | .636 | 1.113 | 0.8 |
| Enrique von Muy Caliente 2B | 14 | 54 | 3 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 8 | 11 | 0 | 0 | .259 | .355 | .278 | .633 | 0.3 |
| Jaheem Butler LF | 14 | 53 | 7 | 10 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 18 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 0 | .189 | .271 | .340 | .611 | -0.4 |
| Rice Shower SS | 14 | 49 | 5 | 7 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 12 | 14 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 0 | .143 | .246 | .286 | .531 | -0.4 |
| Man Of Steal 3B | 14 | 48 | 5 | 14 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 15 | 7 | 5 | 0 | 0 | .292 | .393 | .312 | .705 | 0.4 |
| Tommy Killfigure RF | 10 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .333 | .333 | .333 | .667 | 0.0 |
| Gunnar Skovgaard SS | 10 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | .333 | .500 | .333 | .833 | 0.1 |
