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| Name | G | AB | R | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | TB | BB | K | SB | CS | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WAR |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Palin Drome LF | 40 | 172 | 18 | 51 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 18 | 59 | 14 | 21 | 0 | 0 | .297 | .348 | .343 | .691 | 0.7 |
| Jordan Love DH | 40 | 170 | 26 | 59 | 4 | 1 | 6 | 24 | 83 | 8 | 28 | 0 | 0 | .347 | .374 | .488 | .863 | 1.0 |
| Stick Man 2B | 40 | 169 | 26 | 60 | 12 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 81 | 10 | 24 | 9 | 4 | .355 | .388 | .479 | .867 | 2.2 |
| Lestat de Lioncourt C | 40 | 168 | 27 | 51 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 18 | 60 | 25 | 25 | 24 | 0 | .304 | .392 | .357 | .749 | 1.9 |
| Walter Walterson 3B | 40 | 163 | 31 | 46 | 8 | 2 | 8 | 36 | 82 | 13 | 30 | 0 | 0 | .282 | .326 | .503 | .829 | 1.2 |
| Kries Von Kriestalhauser CF | 40 | 161 | 28 | 48 | 5 | 0 | 6 | 27 | 71 | 10 | 30 | 0 | 0 | .298 | .337 | .441 | .778 | 1.1 |
| Brent Goldberg RF | 40 | 158 | 23 | 45 | 5 | 1 | 6 | 17 | 70 | 12 | 20 | 0 | 0 | .285 | .335 | .443 | .778 | 0.6 |
| Rob Cena IV SS | 40 | 144 | 24 | 33 | 3 | 1 | 6 | 24 | 56 | 14 | 19 | 0 | 0 | .229 | .298 | .389 | .687 | -0.0 |
| Bill Slamsquatch 1B | 40 | 144 | 19 | 39 | 6 | 0 | 4 | 21 | 57 | 24 | 24 | 0 | 0 | .271 | .375 | .396 | .771 | 1.0 |
